Recently I was asked to give some advice on how to train clients who can’t seem to stay self-motivated. This always becomes a problem this time of year as people start to detour from their new year’s resolutions. After all, anyone can do something for a few weeks when external motivation is high. However, if they have not made a stronger emotional connection to the goal, their motivation will quickly fade.
To get started, I decided to go look up the definition of “motivation.” After sifting through a lot of mumbo jumbo, I came across this simple, yet effective, definition…
“The reason or reasons one has for acting or behaving in a particular way.”
Very interesting. My advice from this point forward was very simple – these clients are “motivated” – they are acting or behaving in a particular way for a reason. It may not be the way we want them to, or even the way that best fits their desired outcomes, but they are, in fact, motivated. When we as personal trainers label them as “unable to stay motivated,” we rob them of their true motivation, tattooing them with a false identity and avoiding taking at least some of the responsibility ourselves.
Perhaps we should stop trying to motivate these clients on our terms, and begin to look at their motivation through a different lens. This is where we may need to make a huge U-turn in our own thought processes. It may be that the client appears to lack motivation because we lack the empathy to see it.
If you are like me and need a definition of empathy, here you go…
“The ability to understand and share the feelings of another.”
We as fitness professionals cannot understand or share our clients’ feelings until we know what A.L.E.s them. To achieve this, we must:
Ask
We have to ask the right questions in the right order to encourage each client’s trust and honesty. Do you have a systematic process to consistently achieve this every time? You should!
Listen
When we talk, we can't listen. Challenge yourself with the W.A.I.T. – Why Am I Talking? –principle when you speak with clients. Listen for key words – buzzwords – that give you insight into their desires, fears and passions.
For example: “I like play with my kids.” “I don’t really enjoying working out.”
A few statements like this can provide huge insight into clients’ beliefs about exercise and how they want to engage in it. They may enjoy playing, but not working. If their exercise program looks and feels like work – low interaction and minimal fun during the exercises – they will be much more likely to “lose motivation.” Not because they are not motivated, but because they were not put into an environment that fed their motivation.
How often do we create fitness programs with at least some exercises that clients do not like? Why? Out of the infinite exercises that exist, can’t we find ones that our clients like?
“I would like to see results.” “I need you show me how.”
Statements like these may tell you when clients are more visual in nature. They need to “see” things for it to make sense to them. If we try to “tell” (auditory) or have them initially “do” (kinesthetic), they make get confused or intimidated and subconsciously shut down. Again, they may appear to be losing motivation when, in fact, we pushed them away from their motivation,
Listen for words like:
- feel, touch, grasp (kinesthetic)
- see, show, view (visual)
- hear, sound (auditory)
Execute
Once we have asked, listened and gathered insight into our clients, we must execute exercise plans that integrate this information.
The client experience needs to look, sound and feel like what they just told you. If not, they will lose interest. It is that loss of interest that we often confuse for lack of motivation. In contrast, when we keep the focus on their desires and interests, we fuel their motivation.
Self-Challenge
If you have a "playful" client that you always give a plank and they always complain, try this...
Activity: Blow up a balloon, get down on the ground with them and play a game of prone balloon taps.
Questions to ask yourself: Did their attitude suddenly change for the better? Did they appear to be more “motivated” then before? Or is it possible that they have simply been losing interest in the routines you've been giving them?
Rodney Corn is a former collegiate athlete, bodybuilder, international presenter, published author and contributor to numerous fitness industry publications. Rodney is a Co-Founder of PTA Global, where he currently serves as Vice President of Academic Operations.
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